A Million Cups of Tea

I think tea is the one thing that has kept my sanity in life. Somehow, a cup of tea just makes everything better. I don't know how, but there is something comforting to it. I may be addicted... haha!

Gratitude 53

I am thankful for quiet morning hours. :)

This morning I sang in recital hour, so naturally, I had to get up a little on the extra early side, so that my body, voice, and brain were ready for the whole singing thing for 10am. (Oh, how I love singing so early in the day! Not!) It truly was before the crack of dawn, though, because the sun was not up at 7am with me...it likes to sleep in till half seven or even a little later this time of year. And it is so unbelievable cold here! Windchill factor of something around -20°F! Jaj! Quite ridiculous! I was silently hoping that things would be closed today, so that I didn't have to brave the subzero air, but no such luck...everything but universities were closed. Nem szamit. It didn't matter. I would have had to go to the conservatory at some point today anyway, so might as well get my butt over there sooner, sing pretty, and then do everything else I needed to do there before snuggling myself up in the house for the remainder of the afternoon and evening.

I had about two hours of the quiet morning. There's just something special and peaceful in those early morning moments. (...even when you didn't fall asleep till after 1am...) Staying snuggled in your pjs for a short bit while you check The Today Show, putting the kettle on and then sipping a lovely cup of tea, seeing the snow out the window as the sun comes up... It's just peaceful. I love the girls I share my flat with, but we each need our alone time, too. Mornings like today are my favorite "me times".

I am glad we had recital hour this morning, too. Volt nagyon jól. It went very well. :) I do enjoy performing. (And, oddly, I am becoming more accustomed and comfortable with public speaking. I have no idea where this came from, but I was totally calm and collected during my presentation last week and introducing my piece this week. I'm not complaining, but it is strange...especially since I haven't done it that often. Guess it's just another way life abroad raised my bravery/courage level!)

I just love singing, and I just love beautiful music! :) I often wonder how this happened, how my life-driving passions became these things. Why is it that this one particular thing speaks to me so strongly? It is quite curious. I mean, it ultimately doesn't matter. It is what it is. I am what I am. I do what I do. I love what I love. But I am just a curious person, I suppose. My family loves music, but I don't know if they are really musically-inclined. They could be, though, and just never had the opportunities to find their expression through these means. My mother has always sang to us ever since we were babies. She loves singing but never had lessons. My papa told me stories once of his cousins singing folk music. He grew up in the mountains of West Virginia and didn't have much money, but he said that if they had had money or knew someone then, they could have gone somewhere. Perhaps this is where it comes from. It is just perplexing to think of how we get to where we do.

I have been and am unbelievably blessed. Having incredible teachers, studying in Europe, wonderful guidance from mentors, family, and friends, good health, and a lovely, well-used tea kettle. :) I'm only 21 and have experienced so much already. It makes me so excited about life. My dad says that I have already seen and done more than some people do in their entire lifetime. He's right. I am truly blessed. Never pass by the side roads on the highway of life without looking down them, he says, because you may miss the opportunity/experience of a lifetime. I never dreamt I'd be where I am today or the plans that have changed because of it.

Studying abroad...always was a dream...and now I have spent four incredible months in Hungary. (Goes to show there is not a lie in "dreams come true.") My get-the-bachelors-of-music-and-then-grad-school-for-my-masters-from-there plan has been thrown a loop because of these past four months. And you know, that's okay. No, that's amazing. A lesson can be learned here: only so many plans can be made and carried thru, but for the most part, your plans are made for you by a greater power. (That'd be God in my book.) I am learning more and more that time is special. Hungary enforced this concept in me. Why be in such a hurry to "grow up" or get things done. Rushing is silly and only causes you to take more time in the end. It'll all get done in its own time, the time that is best for me, not the kid that sits next to me in class. The knowledge is more precious than the piece of paper that certifies you have acquired that knowledge. However, we, as society, put far more importance on the piece of paper than if we actually have acquired that knowledge.

Nothing really against the States. It's a great place to live. We have "freedom" (or so they say... but that is a debate for another time and place...we are much freer than many countries of the world, but returning and the things I have learned since then have made me realize how it still is not what we call "the land of the free."). It's just different. That's not always a bad thing...but also not always a good thing. Life is very different abroad. Life seems to take a slower pace, time has true value... I like that. I do not enjoy this rush-rush syndrome that affects Americans. It's unnerving and frazzling and just plain stresses me out! Granted, not having choir this semester has certainly allowed me a little more of the pace I enjoy (and to really work on my voice like I got to over there with János), but I still find myself lost in the flurry around me. A bit frustrating.

Well, I am not sure where all of this came from in this post. Hopefully, it somehow makes for some interesting reading. As for events of this past week:

Things have settled a little bit more with each day. Some days are certainly better than others. I know I shouldn't be, but I am still quite furious with some of the things/decisions/actions that occurred while I was gone. Oh, well. What are you going to do? Ugh.

My voice lesson with Lynn went far better. My sound is becoming more and more "me," I think. :) I am so happy for having worked with János. (He's a very good teacher for me. I am excited to work with him again when I return.) The past couple of days, I feel everything we worked on is really starting to settle. That whole "where's the point" thing...I'm actually getting it! (Like I said, my reaction time sucks...jokes, concepts, etc...pretty lame but what can you do?!) Yay! Lynn is a good teacher for me, too, and I know she will let me incorporate what János and I did into my studies. Some teachers would probably try to get me to toss that out the window because it wasn't "their" technique, but I am in good hands. She respects János and knows what a phenomenal musician he is, and she wants the best technique for me, because maybe what works for her isn't best for me. In any respect, she and I will just keep building it all up. I must say, though, that she is very happy with my high notes. :) Thank you, János. It took some confidence-building, but they are getting there, and I am enjoying this soprano world more and more. It's fun!

I had a piano lesson with Chad on Thursday. I told him he needed to be very strict with me. My playing wasn't the best showcase of what I learned, but that's okay. "Perfection is not expected right away, Samantha," as János would lecture to me. haha! Nem baj. I don't think piano is the same without Orsolya, but Chad will guide me well, I know.

I also had a harmony lesson with Dr. Ryan on Thursday. He's a good teacher, and although it's not the Hungarian system, his tutoring in some advanced theory and harmony will be very helpful. He is willing to do most things my way, too. Good. haha! He knows why I need and want these lessons and seems pretty cool with it all, so I think this will be good.

Other than that, nothing too eventful happened that I can particularly recall. A few minor crises...mainly with my stupid computer...resulting in more cups of tea. (Yes, I may have a tea problem.) Life is okay. And okay is alright sometimes.